Going through a divorce and a child custody dispute is stressful, but it’s important that you never let that stress transfer to your children or the parenting relationship you have with your ex. It’s easy to become consumed by anger, but this is counterproductive. Instead, you should try to remain calm so that you can make parenting plan decisions that are in your child’s best interests.
One of the most important things to remember in these cases is that you have to be willing to treat your co-parent with respect. Whatever the reasons that your relationship with your co-parent soured, they’re still your child’s other parent — and that’s key to remember.
Why is respect important?
Disrespect fosters animosity, and that’s never good when you have to work with another person — and you will, most likely, be co-parenting with your ex-spouse for some years to come. Civility and respect can help facilitate health conversations, a cooperative attitude toward parenting and better choices about your children’s needs.
Being respectful in this situation is also beneficial to the children. It’s modeling behavior that can help the children learn that you can still show each other respect even if you don’t especially like each other. This is a life skill that is often only learned when they can see it in action.
For some parents, being respectful to each other is difficult. It might help if you think of the communication as a business matter. It may also behoove you to use written communication so there is a record of what’s being said. Regardless of what’s going on, try to never rely on the children to pass messages back and forth.
Working out a good parenting plan can be difficult. When emotions are running high, it’s often easier (and smarter) to let your attorney handle the negotiations so that you can better preserve your co-parenting relationship.
